Catullus 4
Apr. 24th, 2020 08:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
essivecaseA new edition of no-namedrop Catullus, as first presented and outlined here. This one is #4, which was requested some time ago (thanks Yasemin!!), and I've only just finished it, because turns out Catullus 4 is a tough nut, and not just to translate: there are so many proper nouns, and sticking to my goal of removing the lot of them was a real challenge. It was a lot of fun, though, and I'm pretty happy with how this one turned out!
4
this ship you see? it would say
that it was the fastest ship, that
any assault, any timber set to float,
this ship would surely best it
on wings of oar or linen.
this ship would say: these waters of ours
do not disagree; nor the horde of islands
nor the noble one alone; nor the rough and far-flung
landlocked sea; nor the gulf with its wicked curve
where this ship, before it was so, was
a bristling forest. on the ridges above the city
this ship whispered with its talkative leaves —
to the bustling port and the box-treed gulf,
this ship would say: you’ve known this always
and you know it still. from its first moments
this ship would say it stood on your summit,
drowned its oars in your level waters,
and then through all those unruly straits
it carried its master, sent port or starboard
with a breeze loosed upon it, or some god’s
strike, simultaneous, to the ropes of its sails;
and yet to the gods of those very shores
no vows were made, when this ship came fresh
from the sea to this translucent lake.
but this is all history: now this ship is stowed
to rest, to grow old — dedicated to you,
the twin bright star and the bright star’s twin.
-
Postscript on the translation —
I'm particularly proud of how I turned some of the proper nouns into descriptions, so here is a glossary:
4
this ship you see? it would say
that it was the fastest ship, that
any assault, any timber set to float,
this ship would surely best it
on wings of oar or linen.
this ship would say: these waters of ours
do not disagree; nor the horde of islands
nor the noble one alone; nor the rough and far-flung
landlocked sea; nor the gulf with its wicked curve
where this ship, before it was so, was
a bristling forest. on the ridges above the city
this ship whispered with its talkative leaves —
to the bustling port and the box-treed gulf,
this ship would say: you’ve known this always
and you know it still. from its first moments
this ship would say it stood on your summit,
drowned its oars in your level waters,
and then through all those unruly straits
it carried its master, sent port or starboard
with a breeze loosed upon it, or some god’s
strike, simultaneous, to the ropes of its sails;
and yet to the gods of those very shores
no vows were made, when this ship came fresh
from the sea to this translucent lake.
but this is all history: now this ship is stowed
to rest, to grow old — dedicated to you,
the twin bright star and the bright star’s twin.
-
Postscript on the translation —
I'm particularly proud of how I turned some of the proper nouns into descriptions, so here is a glossary:
- Phasellus becomes "this ship," which I decided to echo every time I refer to the ship, whether or not Phasellus is used
- the Adriatic sea becomes "these waters of ours"
- the Cyclades become "the horde of islands"
- Rhodes becomes "the noble [island] alone"
- the horridam[que] Thraciam Propontida (the Sea of Marmara) becomes "the rough and far-flung landlocked sea"
- the Pontic/Black Sea becomes "the gulf" when it appears twice, the second time as an elided city
- Cytorus becomes "the city" and "the bustling port"
- Castor becomes the "bright star"
- Oh and btw "some god" is Jupiter lol
- volare (lit. to fly) as "on wings of"
- a mari novissimo (lit. from the newest/most recent sea [visited]) as "fresh from the sea"
- laeva sive dextera (lit. left or right) as "port or starboard"
